first thing you would do if you woke up next to the person above you?

I see you've summoned me.

 

Texan, eh? I thought I sensed a mixture of hospitality and crazy from you.

 

What is this disease and how do I get it

 

You're kidding

 

Curious though, what about me makes you think I'm hospitable? That's kinda cute.

 

Gut feeling.

 

Sell them their own organs but on discount

 

Cut off their arm, cook it, and make them watch as I eat it.

 

Ask him to speak in a non-horny way (almost impossible).

 

...